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If his last girlfriend texted him 4,000 times a day, you know not to text him 4,000 times a day and thus, only text him 3,999 times a day. One of the hardest parts about dating someone new is "oh my god, who even is this stranger?! He already knows some of your #issues and is fine with them." but with him, you already have a pretty good sense of who he is because you've spent the last year hanging out with him like pals. He knows that you start imagining he's dead on the side of the road when he doesn't text you back for eight hours so he does his best not to make you think he's dead. If he's the type of guy who would've been your friend whether you eventually dated or not, he's already the best kind of guy to date.In a post for Fox News Magazine, Kim Olver, author of “Secrets of Happy Couples: Loving Yourself, Your Partner and Your Life,” stresses the importance of friendship in romance: When I think of reasons people cheat, I often hear things like, 'She never supports me.' 'He didn't want to spend time with me.' 'She doesn't understand me.' 'He never really listens when I talk to him.' 'I don't even think s/he likes me.' 'S/he is always complaining.'Aren't all these statements really the opposite of the core of friendship?Think about how you are with your friends: You tell each other everything.We all know the guys who meet you and become friends with you but are really only doing that because they hope one day you'll bone and then if you ever get a boyfriend, they hate you. With him, you've always known he would be your friend either way because he genuinely likes you no matter what, which is the best foundation ever for a kickass relationship. You know how to make each other laugh, so telling him a joke isn't like throwing piles of dust into the wind. You know the basics about his childhood and any possible weirdness there.When you date strangers, it's so hard to know what their sense of humor is or what they find funny, so often you feel like a total weirdo when a joke doesn't land because he doesn't get it or it's not his thing. It's been like a year of the hottest foreplay of your life. No, you haven't met his family yet but you know what his sister does for work, and if he had a brother who was not that nice to him, and whether or not he had a nice or crappy childhood, all of which allowed you to understand him way more than a guy on Tinder you've spoken to for 60 minutes about sports.9.

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At this point, it's easy as pie to tell when he's being weird because he's working too much or because he's kind of pissed off at you because of something you said or if he needs help because he's probably an alcoholic who won't admit it.Dopamine, found in the brains of people who are addicted, is also involved. The level found in lovers is the same as that found in people experiencing obsessive compulsion.No wonder partners both obsess about the loved one and idealize the person. I’m saying I’ve got the secret for having your cake and eating it, too.You are generous to each other with your time, your ideas, your feelings.You value what’s in the other person’s head and who that person is.




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