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After my husband and I divorced, I assumed that dating as a single parent wouldn't give me any of those things.

I had all these preconceived notions and ideas, like that I'd used up all the "great loves" allotted for my lifetime and that I'd only have mediocre partners from here on out, or that I'd thrown away the best loves I'd ever known.

So figuring out when and how to start dating after a divorce can be a real dilemma for a divorced dad.

Many dads take a long time to recover before they are ready to date again; and some are ready within a few weeks or months.

I can describe each of those loves very perfectly: with my first boyfriend, it was naive and all-consuming; with my husband, it was instantly, unbelievably love at first sight; and when I fell in love with my third partner while I was still married to my husband, it was a different kind of love: fast, overwhelming, and fueled by passion.What makes a person ready for a new relationship is examining and accepting his or her role in the liaison that went bad; it really does take two.Devote a little time now to thinking about why you got into an unhappy relationship or allowed it to continue—kick yourself once, if you must—and figure out what you will do differently next time.If he's really put off by the idea of you dating a man other than his father, explain that you're making new friends, just like he does when he's in a new situation.Try to maintain your usual routines with your son so that your dating doesn't disrupt his day-to-day life and he still has lots of time with you.




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Free sites may also work better for individuals who are separated, but not yet divorced (or separated with no immediate intention to divorce).